How I went from Diva to Ms. Prudish Diva

I grew up the love of the family. I was such a beautiful, smart, shy chunky lil kid (still am a shy, smart, thick beauty by the way). Back in the day, I was about 14, my grandma noticed that I was getting noticed. I was always around my male cousins who were always around their friends and she couldn’t have me getting pregnant. My grandma had 3 girls and 3 boys and 2 girls had kids at 15 (my mom) and the other at 16 2 boys had kids at 15 and 16 too. I made a promise to my grandma that I would stay a virgin until I was 18. My grandma died a couple months later so I decided to keep that promise. I decided early on that it would be impossible for me to keep that promise and still try to have my lil boyfriends so I focused on school and trying to get out of the hood… cuz the hood in Baltimore ain’t nothin to mess with..

But when I turned 18.. please.. I was ready to jump on the first non-kin penis available… at least that’s what I thought until I actually turned 18 and started dating … then I realized I didn’t want to just give my virginity up until anybody.. and what would people think? Me... going from the innocent, quiet, college-bound girl to the neighborhood jump-off? Not a good look.. not a way I wanted to be.. I mean.. what would Jesus think? Right? So I talked to guys… I had dropped 30 pounds and I realized I had what guys wanted… T&A… lots of it.. I mean.. I always knew shawty had an ass on her but I never thought my chest was that big… Everybody in my family was a part of the SBTC.. super big ttity committee.. smallest (excluding me) was a DD so I never knew my D’s were something to rave about.. but hey.. they are I guess.. lol… but anyway, I digress.. I wasn’t focusing on a boyfriend.. I was focusing on having as many dudes on the team as possible.. 3 months after I turned 18 and got off into the dating game.. I had at the very least 5 on the team at all times.. Everybody was tryna lock down Ms. Prudish Diva but she wasn’t having it… because she was having fun.. and being a diva..

Another thing that made me the way I am today is because I grew up around a lot of males. All of my uncles have been living with my mama since I can remember, one of them still does actually. They were (and still are), for lack of a better word, womanizers. They had the main chick, but a different chick over every night. My older brother consistently keeps 3 girlfriends at a time and my younger is running thangs in high school with a couple on his team. My cousins… they all keep at least 5 chicks on the team at all times. I never wanted to be those girls. Committed to this dude who will never be committed to me... I know the games that guys play cuz I watch it all the time... So it leaves me having trust issues with guys.. cuz as much as I try to believe that there are some good black men out there.. niggas negate my thinking.

Another thing is... I have always taken measures to not look like a hoodrat. I don't wear colored hair. I don't wear a lot of styles. I wore braids most of my life and now my hair is down to my bra strap and I press it out and flat-iron it or curl it. I try not to be too revealing. If I have on shorts with my legs out, no cleavage or back will be shown and vice versa. I guess that helped.

Now... just because I am a prude... dont mean i just sit in my house all day.. I love to go out and have fun... club, movies, dancing, galleries, hanging with friends, etc.